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TODO: make a compelling website aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
(2024/8/4)
I'm just realizing that I don't have very much interesting to say, other than that this is the first video I've released in two years somehow. I am a terrible procrastinator, and for these past couple of years I have also been a terrible procrastinator with no deadlines. This video was mostly completed in less than two weeks in January 2023, but missing the Spongebob perfume department background and the thumbnail were all it took to prevent me from finishing the video even though these shouldn't be intimidating sorts of things. Neither of these things ended up being particularly difficult; the thumbnail took some prototyping but I honestly can't believe how good it came out. Yesterday I had the experience of looking at it and going "this is me? i made this? i actually made this? becoming good at art is something that's really going to happen to me? the 2D animated music videos i see in my head every day aren't completely just a distant fantasy???".
It took a friend holding me accountable to a deadline to get this video done, so if you are like me and are wallowing in purgatory because of a lack of discipline (and possibly because you have unwittingly trained yourself to believe that you don't finish the things you care about), you might need to get someone in your life to do this to you. I still really don't like having external stakes, but even after years and years of trying, literally nothing else works and I hate that fact so much. I want to make things happen. I shouldn't need consequences to make me care. But at least with where my brain currently is... it seems like i do. I think that not working and finishing things just made my brain not register finishing my projects as a priority, even if I really care about these things deep down and want to see them created. I'm thinking that finishing things so little over the last 2+ years has just left my brain being apathetic because it doesnt see a reward at the other end of the rainbow. Maybe someday I will have answers rather than educated guesses of how to improve myself in this regard. Oh well. At least I now know I have someone in my life that can beat me into shape if i let him. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
→ here's what I had to say in my notes on January 5th, 2023, at the start of this incredibly involving project (/s):
"
i started on a danny phantom poop today after some clips (particularly "yeah BOYEEE") amused me yesterday
and i started on sents mixing mr. spencer [sic] talking abt wanting to see his "erect penis" (smhw "erection" rhyming with "reflection" came hours later) in danny, but he only saw his own ass.
i started w th bill wurtz abcdefghijk bc i saw tht th 1st time this morning (ty YT algorithm for reccomending me 1 of the rly short wurtz videos every morning... like srsly im happy it picked up on me watching a few of those lol) and wanted t shoehorn it into a video.
so then i photoshopped an ass onto danny's face... and the rest o th jokes came after.
i already found the very very gay looking hug + the sonic frontiers sad song. i wanted to jam them into a video somehow... and this one ended up fitting them well so that's what happened. :0
cant believe all i needed t actly get some work done was just starting some dumb bullshit and trying to keep my head down instead of in the clouds (ie. in th macro idea for the video) and... well here i have arrived :0
i still spent a lot o time today rewatching [my work (this is a bad habit of mine)] - esp. at the end - but i'm honestly so happy just t b actly working on smth again.
and ofc im really happy how much of a piece this video is. Like it leans a lot on the song and on the bill wurtz thing (literally his entire video is in this video), but it works well and doesnt *feel* lazy.
"